feeling a bit blah

i have been taking taxis everywhere for the past 2.5 weeks, and i'm not finding any improvement in my ankle. it's getting to the point now that i'm starting to feel a bit depressed about it. i don't go anywhere except class, team meetings, and church. i haven't even been able to get groceries because the store is really too far to walk but too close to take a taxi. i've decided today that i'll go between my classes, so that at least i'll be taxing from the school to the store, so it will make it more worthwhile to ride. hehe
there are a few reasons why the whole ankle thing is making me a bit depressed. obviously the pain itself is a big factor. what's really difficult is that i can't find any specific trigger, so i can feel fine one moment and then suddenly be twitching because it hurts so much. if i could at least pinpoint what causes the pain (ex, walking too much, wearing or not wearing the brace i have, walking up stairs, etc) then i could just try to cut out the offending activity and hope for improvement. instead i'm always a little bit on edge because i know that it could start to hurt in the middle of any activity.
another reason i feel sad is because there aren't really any good options here for treatment, so i feel helpless and afraid that waiting until thailand in january or the states in the summer might injure my tendons/ligaments even more. it's awful to feel like my living situation is possibly preventing me from finding a solution.
and then there's the "stuck in my house except for absolutely necessary excursions" factor. as it is, i feel like i can't really go out after dark because of the cold and safety issues. now i feel like i shouldn't leave my house during the day either. i'm getting a bit stir crazy, and i guess i can understand what it must be like for my cat to stay home all the time. hehe at least we have each other for company. :)
it always helps me to talk through whatever's bothering me, and i feel a tiny bit better just getting my frustrations off my chest. please pray for me after you read this. :)

a week of feeling weak

this whole "immobilization" thing is rather tricky when i don't have a car and have to walk everywhere. what makes it so tricky is how stubborn i am. i want to just say that the 10 minutes it takes me to walk each way to school isn't going to damage my ankle any more. but then i realize i'm just being stubborn, prideful, and rather foolish. it takes every bit of humility i have to take a taxi instead. i hate taking a taxi when it's less than a kilometer for me to walk and traffic is so bad that it isn't even any faster to go by car. i hate looking like some sort of lazy, spoiled american who would rather pay to sit in a car than walk a short distance. i hate it that i'm not getting any exercise. i hate it that i feel trapped in my house except for necessary outings. and i just hate feeling so weak. but i remember the promise that HIS strength is make perfect in my weakness. i know that he is using this time of limited mobility to teach me - not sure just what the lessons will be, but i'm trusting Him.

a bump in the road

this week someone stole my wallet, my bible, and a large roll of packing tape from my purse... while i was in the school office! i was in the same room and someone had the nerve to take it when i turned my back. thankfully everything in my wallet can be replaced pretty easily and i didn't have much money in it. i think for me the worst part is just knowing that someone at the school did it when i was in the room! i have always said that if anyone ever steals my bible they obviously need to read it more than i do, so now i guess it's actually come true. please ask that whoever took it will read it and get to know the Author.